One step up and two steps back

Will I ever stop looking back?

you could have been a better friend to me

Turn it up

One hundred years from now it will not matter what kind of car I drove, what kind of house I lived in, how much was in my bank account nor what my clothes looked like. But the world may be a little better because I made a difference in the life of child.

Back stabbers, complainers, miserable people

Some people are just nasty, unhappy people who nitpick and find fault in people around them. As hard as I try to be kind, it just isn't enough. There is nothing I can do that is good enough. YEP I'm far from perfect all right and maybe to you I'm nails on a chalkboard, but you aren't perfect either. I'm just going to continue to be me. And you can SUCK it.

Being in a room of assholes all day kinda makes me think of the speech Del Griffith makes in Planes Trains and Automobiles after he is berated by that miserable, cold hearted and cynical business traveler played by Steve Martin. You know that scene? Look it up.

Becoming X

From their album Becoming X released in 1996. The song is known to be wide open to interpretation. For my understanding of it...it could have been my theme song about 2-3 years ago

It's in my honey, it's in my milk

And so it goes

In every heart there is a room
A sanctuary safe and strong
To heal the wounds from lovers past
Until a new one comes along

I spoke to you in cautious tones
You answered me with no pretense
And still I feel I said too much
My silence is my self defense

And every time I've held a rose
It seems I only felt the thorns
And so it goes, and so it goes
And so will you soon I suppose

But if my silence made you leave
Then that would be my worst mistake
So I will share this room with you
And you can have this heart to break

And this is why my eyes are closed
It's just as well for all I've seen
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows

So I would choose to be with you
That's if the choice were mine to make
But you can make decisions too
And you can have this heart to break

And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows

-B. Joel

The next song to learn on my piano

Under haunted skies I see you, ooh,
Where love is lost, your ghost is found,
I braved a hundred storms to leave you,
As hard as you try, no, I will never be knocked down

under the moonlight...the serious moonlight

The full moon tonight reminded me. And so, in memory of last summer's fun, here's a shout out to my alter ego

Lost love...goodbye

A sad but crucial scene in the film when she sits on the roof and will not leave until she finally forgives herself. And at last, she lets go and says goodbye to her old life she knew with him. She lets go of the wedding memory. She says goodbye with love.

Once upon a time

I could feel at the time
There was no way of knowing
Fallen leaves in the night
Who can say where they're blowing
As free as the wind
And hopefully learning
Why the sea on the tide
Has no way of turning
More than this - there is nothing
More than this - tell me one thing
More than this - there is nothing
It was fun for a while
There was no way of knowing
Like a dream in the night
Who can say where we're going
No care in the world
Maybe I'm learning
Why the sea on the tide
Has no way of turning
More than this - there is nothing
More than this - tell me one thing
More than this - there is nothing

Roxy Music circa 1982

For the old anniversary of birth, I bought myself a little gift - a book I have wanted for quite a while:  
EAT PRAY LOVE.

Loved the film, now the book will rock me to sleep with its soulful wisdom.

Thankfully in my old age, I've learned to be the ever practical buyer -- $4 total including shipping on Amazon! Not too shabby.

And today's thought from the film as she studies her Italian English translation book:

Sono solo. E 'ok (I'm alone and it's OK)

Into the shining sun

A permanent solution to a temporary problem

Today was a very sad day for my daughter and other children and families in our community. A child, 15 years old, took her own life. This is a child who spent countless hours with mine.

How sad it is for a person to think that there is no way out and nothing else they can do. I try to tell my kids as much as I can that i love them -- today I said it a bunch of times again and also said they are never alone and their family is always here no matter how bad it gets.

I admit, when I woke this morning, i wasn't feeling so great about my current life situation and got down on myself. But when I heard what happened -- I said to myself, today and every day is a good day because I have my children. They are safe and healthy. I am safe and healthy. We are blessed to have each other. I told my kids that too.

I don't know if any of it sunk in at all but I sure hope so.

My heart breaks for Rachel's parents and sister. I couldn't stand to walk in their shoes and I hope I never will.

When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself. ~ Wayne Dyer

Time will change and even reverse many of your present opinions. Refrain, therefore, awhile from setting yourself up as judge of the highest matters.
~Plato

Words that I am seeing in bright red today

Impetuous

-adjective
1. Acting or done quickly and without thought or care; impulsive.
2. Moving forcefully or rapidly: "an impetuous flow of water"


Venom

–noun
1. poison
2. spite; malice: i.e., the venom of hate or jealousy.

lovin this bluesy tune

I will be in the same room as Robert Plant

I'm so F L I P P I N excited to see the dude on stage next week!!! I wonder what is line up with be.

for now, I enjoy this amazing tune (click on link below)
http://www.playlist.com/playlist/additem/66720273

Who am I?

Still working on the eat, pray, love thing

I just sometimes wish I could go to Bali to figure it all out. This life lesson stuff is so tough to bear

I ain't scared of you

Heard this ditty on 88.9 and liked it right away. I think we'll be hearing more from this singer in the future. She is getting a lot of great press for her debut album.

And I thought I heard on World Cafe that she is accompanied by Dan Auerbach of the Black Keys and he produced it which is even BETTA!

The wind screams mary

I had to pick a song to sing tonight at Karaoke.

and...

well...

"somewhere a queen is weeping. Somewhere a king has no wife."

Wear your inside out

dreaming of the tenderness...

This song has been in my head all day

Sleepless in Seattle...

A love story of a father and his children

"Biutiful" starring Javier Bardem, seen at the Oriental. Not just another night at the movies, folks.

I am saddened and disturbed by the tragedy in Japan. As one who hasn't experienced this kind of catastrophe, I know I have no clue about the absolute suffering this event has caused. I do hope many lives are saved with the current rescue mission.

The soul needs beauty for a soul mate

...When the soul wants...the soul waits

It doesn't matter about time and space between people. If there is real love, nothing can stop it. And one need not search for it. If it's real, love will find YOU.

Electric blue

David Bowie - you will always be ultra cool to me!

"Sound and Vision"

Believe

How can they look into my eyes
And still they don't believe me ?

Finding light

The fog is lifting and I am beginning to see through to the beauty and light to which I was blinded

For the love of trees

Did I mention I love trees?

What is love?

I've enjoyed the film, "Paper Heart"   regarding the subject of love -- finding it, falling into it, being in it, staying in it, going after it, missing it and really knowing it's the real thing. It is a subject that has left me entirely nonplussed  and begging the question of what is the true, real kind? And do I really believe in it or am I just conditioned socially to think it really exists? By the many interviewed in this film, it sounds like many do.

must have backbone

This caught my attention and I am trying to live by it.

"Stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone ought to be."

- Elizabeth Gilbert, writer of "Eat, Pray, Love"

Inspiration

Finally! The inspiration is here! I'm feeling hopeful, alive and UP! Many adventures await!